Open Sorcery

Tag: betrayal

  • “regarding an incident on october 20, 2020”

    dancing off the edge of the world
    tired of all the motion and the sickness 
    it's been five years and I'm not sure if I've gotten 
    better or so much fucking worse 

    (I feel like a walking corpse)
    (a snake in your garden) 

    I still hate you for what you did 
    except 
    I tell myself I no longer care 

    I still build bridges to spite the anger and the fear
    you drilled into me 
    I still flinch when someone knocks on the door or 
    a bell rings too loudly 
    or when someone looks at me too close
    what could they possibly want to know 
    what could I possibly have to offer them

    it couldn't be 
    anything genuine, I thought for the longest time 
    those curious eyes must be another face 
    I'd inevitably want to spit in 

    but no, five years later, I find 
    I simply want the luxury of 
    not having to see your face when I close my eyes 
    and never having to hide myself from you 
    or the world 
    again 

    -Allēna, 10/20/2025

  • Eight wrote this in 2022. It’s called “salome”.

    my teen years taught me nothing of 
    importance 
    except how to write clear and deep
    about what hurts
    I've written enough by now 
    to fill a small library, so
    look back with me - 
    I prayed for an ideal in cold rooms 
    and I still became the only one who could
    save me 
    you look at me at my worst and you
    tell me I've healed 
    you look at me at my best and say 
    I'm not enough
    you told me they only recognize 
    greatness when it's in a party dress
    dancing, not a day older than twenty
    so tell me why I got more done 
    half dead with godlike confidence 
    than I ever did the way you asked of me? 

    would you have given me 
    half your kingdom 
    a wild prophet's head on a silver 
    platter 
    if I'd only been nice enough? 
    I'm not your Salome, I'm not your 
    beautiful daughter, 
    I'm iron and blood with war in my veins 
    I am the wild prophet you tried to kill
    call for my head all you like,
    I will no longer be 
    a pawn in your game

    11/20/2022

    -Allēna