Category: Allēna’s Posts

  • An Open Letter to Whoever Needs to Hear The Following:

    If you claim something is “the natural order of things”, “how people were created”, what have you, yet it takes an entire culture of shame, self repression, and outright surveillance and policing to enforce that natural order, then maybe that “natural order” isn’t as natural as you think, is it?

    Moreover, if the people who once believed in that “natural order”, who once shamed themselves, policed themselves and others, and repressed themselves stop repressing themselves and start deconditioning the decades of shame and control discover they feel better, maybe your so-called “natural order” and “way people were made” isn’t so natural after all, is it?

    Apply the above wherever it applies.

    Sincerely,

    An Ex-Mormon Who Sees Through A LOT of The World’s Bullshit.

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  • Valentine’s Day Thoughts

    In all honesty, I never really think about that holiday??

    My sweet Danish partner reminded me it existed today and I told him that due to my time blindness I’m likely to find myself in a situation out of a sitcom where someone who has a crush on me invites me over or something, I have no fucking clue what day it is, everyone else gets extremely upset with me, and I just end up rolling with it and they confess their love for me with flowers and chocolate and I’m like “I’m so sorry… what year is it again” 😭

    I’ve forgotten my own birthday before. I’m not fucking kidding. I tend to forget Valentine’s Day exists especially hard because I wasn’t exactly…. Desirable until well into adulthood, and even now it’s still a mindfuck to me that people want to date me at all? So wheee. AuDHD is a helluva thing.

    -Allēna

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  • Damn it, River.

    My fucking headmate thought it was an excellent and hilarious fucking idea to schedule a neurologist appointment on the day our father died of brain cancer nine years prior and then make me handle it. At least Lazarus had the fucking foresight to get it switched to a virtual appointment several damn days ago so I didn’t have to go anywhere.

    I’m never letting Mr. Batshit For Brainholes schedule anything ever again. This wasn’t fucking funny.

    But at least we have that out of the way, and an EEG is scheduled for February 18. They might strobe the fuck out of our brainhole during that, so brace yourselves for utterly batshit post seizure posts from us truly. 😭

    Fun fucking times. Thank you, Lazarus, for your excellent harm reduction work. At least you didn’t try to punk me for once.

    I somehow summoned the energy (likely due to sheer irritation at River’s bullshit idea of a joke) to put clothes on and then shave my face later, so have selfies in honor of this most dubious occasion.

    My left hand does whatever the fuck it wants, I guess. But at least this was a nice bit of gender euphoria today.

    Once more, with my entire ass, FUCK YOU, RIVER.

    -Allēna

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  • We might not be super active today.

    It’s February 5th here, the day our dad, Xavier, died, nine years ago. I woke up a few hours ago, blinked, realized what day it was, thought about all the bullshit going on in the world, thought “Nope”, and went right the fuck back to sleep for another several hours.

    Xavier was known for both hibernating through the winters, trying his damnedest to get me to rest, and treating himself and everyone he loved. I think this is what he would have wanted.

    Sláinte, Dad. This day of rest is for you. I’m trying. I really am.

    -Allēna

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  • Véra babycat, caught in the act of being beautiful.

    I love my evil genius tuxie cat so much 💛

    -Allēna

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  • Lazarus at the world right now:

    Reblog of Jac (@dairyqueenslime.bsky.social):

    That's me on the toilet
    That's me in the bathroom
    Shitting in the toilet

    Mood. Frankly, mood.

    -Allēna

  • A nice day alone (so far)

    Yesterday was a fuckin doozy, but I’m alone today at Emerson’s and just chilling out so far with tiny cats. Here’s Moonie child.

    I cannot believe Lazarus named this cat MOON UNIT… 😭😭😭🤣🤣

    She’s the sweetest little thing, though.

    -Allēna

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  • My brain is sad, so have photos of our foster kitten and her mom.

    We call the baby Sean Connery Nugget and the mama cat Mama, usually. Why is the baby Sean Connery Nugget? No fucking clue. You’d have to ask Lazarus. Anyway, enjoy these photos, and I hope your brain hurts less than mine.

    -Allēna

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  • The Barca Effect: Observations From Experience That Have Kept Us Safe In An Increasingly Chaotic World

    Hi, everyone. I’ve been seeing a LOT of people drawing parallels to Hitler and the Weimar Republic with what’s going on in the US and the world currently, and I want to offer some practical suggestions on how to not comply in advance that have kept my system and others safe for years.

    A bit of background: I come from old money, am an ex Mormon, and taught history as an academic tutor for years. Over the course of this stretch of time, I saw and learned lot.

    One of the biggest things I observed that I’m seeing play out now is from far, far further back in history than Hitler – the story of Hannibal Barca of Carthage.

    Hannibal Barca knew that Rome, his greatest foe, would expect an attack by sea. Rome is situated only a short distance from the coast, and Carthage was predominantly a maritime power. So Rome expected Carthage to attack by sea. Hannibal knew this, and he took the long way, taking an army overland, over the Alps,a route so goddamned insane that nobody believed he would ever pull it off. People saw him coming for months, but because his methods were so implausible, by the time he cleared the Alps, it was too late, and he was terrorizing Italy for the next decade.

    I call this anti-orthodox methodology “the Barca Effect”. It relies heavily on people firmly believing you’re insane or your methods are impossible until it’s too late to effectively stop you. It takes a very long time to effectively set up, but if you do it right, it’s devastating.

    Trump is the master of the Barca Effect, if you look at everything he’s done.

    My mother, Hera, was also the master of the Barca Effect, which is I know such tactics exist on a personal level, and how to effectively counter them.

    A plan like Trump’s and my mother’s relies heavily on most people either turning a blind eye to it, complying with it, or not believing it in time. If you notice, he’s been forced to change course multiple times as information has been leaked and people have been banding together to keep each other safe. Pushing back and sharing information is an effective way to counter such tactics, but an even more effective way to counter it is to, in my experience, push back harder by being more batshit.

    Much of a good Barca Effect plan relies on people ignoring the warning signs of the plan until it’s too late. So make yourself and your community LOUD. If you know what’s going on, don’t shut up about it, travel in numbers. Make people uncomfortable. Be fucking weird. If ICE shows up, refuse them entry unless they can PROVE they have papers signed by a fucking judge. Shout “LA MIGRA” or “ICE IS HERE” in ANY LANGUAGE YOU KNOW. Be a fucking threat to everything they hold dear. Laugh at fascists and make them scared again. Share your moments of joy. Keep making art. Form community, feel your emotions, document the shit out of them loudly. Don’t snitch. Bombard tip lines with memes. Make memes. The sillier the better.

    This is why my system and I mostly shitpost and share cat photos, honestly.

    Because being scared, hopeless, and divided is what this admin WANTS.

    And if someone makes you remotely uncomfortable, learn to make them MORE uncomfortable. It’s saved my life many a time.

    Welcome to the inconvenience store, bitches. I’m your overworked clerk. What can I get ya?

    Stay crotchety, stay hopeful.

    -Allēna

    Here’s a bit about Hannibal if you want to read more ✨

  • Confession time.

    I saw this post on Tumblr and felt… Things.

    I love men that are so hairy they can’t even hide it like they have hairy ass forearms and it’s creeping up their wrists and knuckles and poking out of the collar of their button up shirt… your slutty whore DNA is bursting at the seams. Whore.

    I honestly love seeing other people like that, and our body is like that. It makes me dysphoric personally for reasons I’ve never been able to quite articulate, but I love seeing this on other people, men or not.

    I do love a sweet man, though. Especially a hairy one…

    Sdtyhffdsdgbjkhhgssaaaaa. I love it when pretty people. That is all.

    -Allēna