Open Sorcery

Tag: plural

  • Emerson and Ashley went to Honeybee Sage yesterday and Ashley read two poems.

    They will roll out elsewhere on social media in early June, but I am going to share them here now.

    He kicked absolute ass, and tbh I think he’s a natural performer. I think he did better than me.

    -Allēna

  • As the lab results roll in, I’m hard at work on medical theories because that’s what we do..

    It’s plausible that due to Hera‘s incredible (heavy sarcasm) DIY MKULTRA scheme she put us through in our late teens and early twenties, the high doses of lithium we were on damaged our pituitary gland, adrenals, and kidneys while our thyroid bounced back, aided by the Vitamin B100 experiment Laz started a few months ago. HRT has quite possibly made it worse because (hypothetically) nothing that’s supposed to process testosterone normally can or will.

    Huzzah. I hate this existence sometimes. Fuck psychiatry. We didn’t even need to be on lithium anyway. But here we are, persevering through this existence by means of sheer fucking spite. I’ve written a note to our PCP about this theory already. I’ll see what he says.

    -Theo, standing in for Allēna today because she fell asleep.

  • Getting Back on Track

    When we were younger, mid teens or so, our family would always accuse us of having a one track mind and say that we needed to “get off the track” when we hyperfocused on something a bit too hard for their taste or comfort.

    I, Allēna, am particularly bad about that. I’m very tightly wound, and I feel like a compressed coil much of the time. If something releases pressure on that coil, I might just.. Erupt and spill everywhere. I know much of that pressure is self imposed now that I’m an adult and is the result of a life filled with trauma, and as a result I am slowly but surely learning that I can learn to relax and I’ll still be safe and not everything will go to shit. I don’t have to be this poised image of perfection, and nor does everyone else. Not all the time, anyway. I view my AuDHD/CPTSD pattern recognition as both a blessing and a curse in this respect. It makes me very anxious, but I also get a lot done and a lot done in a way that gets results.

    That being said, I’ve been slowly learning now that life is becoming more stable to make time for my special interests, both old and new. That hyperfocus, that “track”, if you will, is what energizes me. I can’t switch mental trains of thought or tasks easily like a neurotypical or someone who has a different “flavor” of ADHD can. However, whatever I’m doing, if I care about it and enjoy it, I give it my all. I throw my entire soul into it, and gods, does  it make me feel alive again.

    It never hasn’t..

    I don’t know if I’m ever going to be able to relax through my burnout like a neurotypical will. However, I do know that engaging with people and things that make me feel alive again when I’m up for the task is the closest thing I feel to R&R.

    And lately, I’ve been giving an old comfort show of mine a re-watch – Heroes. It’s an odd one. I don’t know many people who have seen it at all, but many actors I love are in it, and we watched most of it with our family back in 2011-12 or so, mostly on Wednesday nights.

    It has been an odd experience. Very comforting, yet I only remember about half of it. I think it’s because while I loved it, I was likely severely dissociated at the time, largely focused on other things and people, and may not have been the only headmate in front, but didn’t realize it at the moment.

    I don’t know. What I do know is this – it seems to have been a huge influence on my audio drama The Third Prophecy a little over a half decade later and one of the shows that made my system realize we were plural, but we couldn’t admit that to anyone for several more years.

    I’ll need to keep watching. I’ll keep y’all posted.

    -Allēna

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  • I’m bored, so have a collection of memes that describe my headmate Castor.

    He’s the system’s original host, and is known for showing up, giving Zero Fucks, Saying Very Cryptic Things, and then disappearing again.

    What a fucking guy.

    -Lazarus

  • I was clicking around the blog after months in a dormancy coma and I’ve gotta say…

    I love what my headmates have done with the place.

    Pretty neat.

    Have Allēna’s and Eight’s masterpiece album Mago as a treat before you go. If you’re finding the system via the MadMastodon tag or related ones, I think you’ll like what it has to say. It’s all about deconstructing a high control faith, surviving psychiatry and long term abuse, and finding ourselves. Enjoy.

    -Castor (he/it), the system’s original host.

    Fediverse Reactions

  • Alexithymic Bypass

    Hey, everyone. Lazarus here. I don’t have a lot of energy right now. However, I’ve discovered that Google made a tool that combines certain emojis that I’ve found to be very handy when it comes to expressing emotions when I really have no idea where to start or am too tired to express the mixed bag I am experiencing emotionally. This is  roughly what I am feeling right now, for example.

    When you’re tired but still trying to figure out what the fuck is going on.

    I also want to share this cool playlist Theo cooked up 💛 Here it is:

    And as a fun bonus treat in honor of 2025 already being odd, here’s a perennial favorite playlist of mine from years ago, the Last Polycule at the End of the World.

    Insomnia and the cold weather have been kicking my ass physically and mentally and physically, but I’ve been having a lot of vivid dreams. So here’s a meme in honor of that that a friend/crush of mine sent me, lol.

    Manifestation. ✨

    I aim to be back tomorrow, lovely gremlins. Until then, I wish I was here:

    I found this from the page Xochitl Banks on Facebook. This sounds lovely to my cranky body.

    Stay tuned for more magic. I will be dealing with my cantankerous body, hahahaaaaa….

    -Lazarus

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  • AJ Rose – In Conversation

    Hello! My name is Siege, and I’m a newer addition to the Ashley system. We recently asked one of our friends, the author, lyricist, and creator AJ Rose, to do an interview with us here on Open Sorcery. I don’t want to keep you all waiting with my rambling, so without further ado, here is our conversation with the brilliant AJ!

    Introductions Are In Order

    Hey. My name is AJ Rose and I am an independent author/lyricist. My pronouns are he/they. I am openly transmasc and focus my writing toward being inclusive of the LGBTQIA+ community. If you’d like to follow me on Facebook for updates, memes, shitposting, and/or an all around good time I welcome you.

    The Interview

    1. You’ve told me several things about what you’re working on over the course of our friendship thus far – a novel series with accompanying concept albums. What do you want readers to know about the series?

    My series focuses on the right to love who you love and goes over several different concepts while being centered as a paranormal romance (heavy on the romance). It is meant to show how there are many different forms of romantic love in the world while also highlighting challenges faced for being who you are.

    1. Where do you find your inspiration? Why does that spark creativity for you?

    I find inspiration from a lot of other authors. Deborah Harknesses All Souls Series is what initially inspired me to get back into writing. I love her series and it helped me formulate my story in the way I want it to be presented.

    I also draw inspiration from music. I heavily focus on metal style music. Motionless In White sparks a lot of lyrical creativity for me and the reason is mostly because their music is usually about real world issues, relationships, and how horrible the American system is.

    1. You’ve spoken a fair bit to my system about being plural yourself as well as being bigender. Do either of those facets of your identity influence your characters or stories at all?

    Yes and no. I find it is easier for me to create characters because I am a plural person. I can give them a voice in my head. I can visualize who I want them to be. I can make the characters talk to one another and play out the scene for myself while I’m writing.

    Being part of the LGBTQIA+ community influences my characters overall. My novel series features straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian, and poly relationships.

    I have also dropped considering myself bigender and embraced that I am actually transgender. Transmasc just helps encompass my ENBY self as well.

    1. You’re writing a series about a metal band. What got you into metal?

    The series isn’t about the metal band. They are just a part of the novel. A character in the novel fronts the band. I apologize if I didn’t clear that up during our discussions.

    In terms of what got me into metal, my parents were heavy rock music lovers. My dad was a huge Metallica fan when I was growing up which is considered metal. As I got older, my sister would show me their music and it was heavier metal. Pretty much, I grew up on it and it’s the genre that speaks the most to me.

    1. On the musical side of things, if you could work with anyone, living or dead, to bring your concept albums to life, who would you have play on these records? Who would you have produce?

    This will be no surprise to the people who know me but Motionless In White. I am a huge fan of their work and Chris Motionless has an amazing voice. He would do my songs well. Production wise, I’m unsure. I’ve never really looked into producers.

    1. Have there been any challenges so far in writing novels about musicians? How have you overcome them so far?

    When it comes up for the character it can be challenging to wrap the concept of how hard musicians have it versus the character himself as he has gone through some awful things in his past. In overcoming that challenge, I try to keep it as realistic as possible. I write the songs as if I were him bleeding his innermost thoughts on paper.

    1. Has anything surprised you about the writing process? Have you learned anything about yourself or your system through this project?

    It hasn’t really surprised me as I’ve known my whole life that writing is hard. It’s something I’m super passionate about. I have learned that my system is very helpful in untangling thoughts for me. If I feel particularly stuck, I can usually work it out with my alter by bouncing it around in my head.

    1. Do you have any musicians or authors that you look up to, of any genre?

    …well here we go again lol Motionless In White is my biggest musical one. Then it’s Bad Omens. Authors, I really aspire to have the ability to write like Deborah Harkness. She’s actually a historian and her novel series is very well written in the historical parts. There are historical parts in my series.

    1. Are there any songs, albums, or novels that helped you learn more about your system and the different facets of who you are, or that got you through a very hard time?

    Headache by Motionless In White perfectly sums up my head. That’s really all I can say there.

    1. What advice would you give to a young author or musician just starting out, especially if they’re plural or queer?

    Just do it. Be you and do what you love. If people don’t like it, that’s on them. The love will vastly outweigh the hate.

    1. When can we expect the first installment in your series to be published?

    I’m not sure. I’m still working on editing. My best advice is to follow me on Facebook or TikTok @WitchySerious.

    Closing Thoughts

    I hope you enjoyed this conversation! I personally can’t wait to see more of AJ Rose and his work. I think they have some great advice and really wonderful experience to pull from.

    It has been a Day, so I’m going to wander off now. However, stay tuned for more magic!

    -Siege