Open Sorcery

Open Sorcery is the world of Lazarus Halliwell.

Excellence and batshittery, done on purpose.

I’m Lazarus. I make art, music, poems, plays, and magic for the quiet, brilliant, broken ones. If that is you, welcome home. I adopt your kind.

[Subscribe to my email list and I’ll send you a track I don’t remember recording.]

More about me here.

Please note that, with rare exceptions, any and all names mentioned in this blog are pseudonyms except our own. We want to be able to speak freely without doxxing anyone.

Blog

  • Here’s a clip from my performance tonight at Showcase Onstage 💛

    -Allēna

  • I had a lovely poetry performance in the opensorceryy club with mk today!

    I read for 45 minutes on accident, I feel like I performed for far too long.

    However, mk seems to have had no issue with it.

    Emerson also got video of much, if not all, of the set, so y’all can expect videos in the next few days.

    Now I’m just chilling and watching Charlotte Dobre Reddit drama videos. I’m gonna hit the showers after this next one.

    -Allēna

  • Emerson and Ashley went to Honeybee Sage yesterday and Ashley read two poems.

    They will roll out elsewhere on social media in early June, but I am going to share them here now.

    He kicked absolute ass, and tbh I think he’s a natural performer. I think he did better than me.

    -Allēna

  • JEEEEZ, fronting after this long is weird…

    This is Renn, I haven’t been out in about two years. I don’t even know if I have a category on this blog for my posts yet, it’s been so long since I last fronted. Additionally, I came to front because Lēna was feeling out of it in the shower, so I took over so she could rest. I am not entirely sure how long she’ll be out, but I’m here for the time being at the wheel, so to speak, to give her a rest and get ahead on the system’s projects so that she can take a breather. She seems to be okay and safe and in relatively good spirits, just mentally tired.

    The same could be said for the body, in all honesty. This H1 + H2 experiment that she’s started is frankly a stroke of genius and I’m glad that we’re in this good of shape – it’s about 3:20 AM as I am writing this and I was able to get our social media posts scheduled up to a week in advance, June 4th, to be precise. I don’t consciously feel super tired yet, but seeing as it’s late and I did have a midnight coffee, it’s better to be safe than sorry, especially if I switched in because Lēna was feeling out of it. I should probably consider going to sleep soon ish rather than making even more videos until the ass crack of dawn.

    So it’s bedtime for me, or at least I’m going to attempt to sleep. Emerson is sleeping beside me, and honestly it’s wonderful to see him again. I’ve missed him terribly. The headspace is nice and very peaceful, but getting some time in the outside world is good and I have greatly needed it, I think.

    This is all for now. If I am in front tomorrow, I will say hi then. If I am not, let this be my goodbye until I see y’all next time.

    Much love,

    Renn

  • I probably did too much today.

    But I had therapy for the first time since March  and it felt productive? My therapist suggested that I reach out to my doctor about getting an anti-anxiety med to make blood draws easier, and I just might do that.

    We also talked about my increase in energy since adding the H2 blocker to my med regimen and all the fears I have that we’re gonna crash mentally and physically in the next week or so, and he walked me through what the worst case scenario would be (I’d survive, it would just be shitty because I would have to go back to the drawing board all over again). I still can’t tell if the conclusion we reached was comforting or not.

    I’m debating whether or not I should shower tonight because it’s 2 AM, the only real towel we have in the house is disgusting, and frankly, I am getting tired. In any case, I should probably wander off.

    Stay tuned for more magic, y’all.

    -Allēna

  • I watched the Super Mario Bros movie with Emerson today.

    It’s fucking unhinged. I absolutely loved it. Emerson wanted to watch it after watching all of the Sonic movies with me. Every scene was different but somehow worked with all the other scenes. Emerson is also a weird lil nerd that knows a lot of the deep lore about the original games, so it was lovely because it was great because I was able to ask him whatever questions I had and he knew the answers. It was so much fun 🤣

    -Allēna

  • Emerson and I were supposed to go for a drive tonight after our very dear friend fixed our headlights,

    but we sort of lost track of time and ended up watching the rest of Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (which we started last night after watching the first movie) and all of Sonic the Hedgehog 3. I had no idea he liked the Sonic games. I want to get him a copy of one of them for his Switch 💛

    -Allēna

  • I FOUND ONE OF MY FAVORITE COMFORT SHOWS FROM WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER AGAIN

    Soooo yeah, I’m gonna probably be rewatching Burn Notice for the next bit when I’m not doing other things or watching Doctor Who with Emerson…

    -Allēna

  • I went to my long expected GI super-specialist appointment yesterday.

    They’ve ordered a lot of tests, including a proper test for MCAS and an upper GI scope. The week beforehand is gonna be hell on earth but I am hoping it’ll be worth it…

    -Allēna

  • The dual antihistamine experiment continues..

    AND I WAS ABLE TO HAVE CAFFEINE TODAY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN ALMOST A YEAR WITHOUT REACTING POORLY

    I DIDN’T NEED A NAP, EITHER

    I haven’t been this happy in a long time.

    -Allēna