y’all get a two for one special tonight. this one’s called “queer pressure”.

after careful consideration, i have determined

that i didn’t know what it was like to put space between the 
world and me, so i held everything and everyone at
an artificial distance while seeing too close, held everything
i ever earned in a vise grip and let myself slip into
the grip of my vices

i stared into the void so long that it blinked before i did 
and then i mistook the deep nothing of it for your eyes
until there was nothing left but a deep, deep hole

here’s the thing about an addiction, though -
admitting you have it is the first step toward vindication

-Allēna 8/2/2025